Showing posts with label tired. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tired. Show all posts

Thursday, October 5, 2017

I am back

Sorry I haven't been blogging, a lot has been going on. I will fill you all in:

1. Our football team got destroyed by the defending state champs
2. I am still cute and positive
3. Bekah's parents want her out of the house when she turns 18 (which is in January). dad told her she can move in here with us YAY!
4. I haven't been playing WOWS that much, I am really into Elite Dangerous now.
5. School is still ok. My grades are good. dad said I need to start thinking about college and what the best school would be for me if I still want to become a vet (which I do).
6. Fencing is going great. We have a tournament in Richmond soon and I hope I do good.
7. Bessie had her teeth cleaned and it is funny when a dog gets their teeth cleaned because for like 2 days afterwards they are all licking their own teeth hahaha.

Everything with Bekah is great. We had a really intense passionate Saturday night. We were going at it for hours. I still haven't let her eat me or finger me yet, but i am feeling more comfortable with the idea. But she is patient and the things we do are very beautiful. I love being under her as we grind together and kiss. Just the intense feeling of bonding with her is something i cannot explain.

Anyway, that is all for now. i will write more this weekend.
Thanks for reading!
Steff

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Friday night blues

So its late Friday night and I need to go to sleep but I want to do a blog entry first.

Bekah was over tonight and I wanted her to stay but she was all distant and stuff and I was like "omfg what now" to myself. So I asked her what was bothering her and she started going on how she is so confused because of the things we do together. I ask her what does she mean by that and she says all the times we are in bed naked and grinding our pussies together and everything else we do is messing with her head. So I am all "How the fuck is that messing with your head?" and she is all "Because I am a lesbian and while we are getting hot with each other I want to do more to you but you keep denying you are a lesbian even though we are always in bed naked, we always rub our pussies together, you let me lick your ass, I have kissed your neck and all how the hell is that NOT being a lesbian?"

So I look at her and I say "Remember what I said I would do to you if you ever thought this way again?" So I belt her across the face hard and she falls back onto my bed. I jump on her and straddle her and pin her arms down. I say to her "Listen Bekah, enough of your sinful lesbian ways ok? What you and I do is bonding as BFFs, there is nothing lesbianish about it. I give certain parts of myself to you because I know it makes you happy, it is MY way of showing you how much I care about you. But it in NO WAY means I am an immoral lezbo. Fuck, I give you such an intimate gift and you totally just trash it by calling it immoral WHAT THE FUCK is your problem?"

And she is under me all tears in her eyes and she is "Steffi please, I am so fucking confused my head and my heart are being ripped apart by your behavior." I just roll my eyes and pin her arms down harder, squeezing her wrists hard. I tell her "Listen Bekah, what we do is NOT lesbian ok? I do NOT find women attractive. I do NOT want to go and try and kiss or eat out or rub pussies with some bitch. I do what I do with YOU and YOU only, I have NO desire for women or men in general. I do what I do with you because I want to make YOU happy and you are seriously fucking it all up!!!!!".

But she is just crying and not answering. I can tell I am making NO headway into her crazed lesbian brain. I feel like kicking her out and just giving up on the whole BFF thing, But then I look at her underneath me. she looks so sad, so helpless. And she is so pretty. And we do have such a great time together and I love holding her and being held by her. I love our intimacy and how it binds us closer. So I decide right then and there I am going to have to fix this somehow. I get off of her and lay down next to her and she is all crying. I lay on my side and just stroke her hair and she turns into me and just wraps herself around me crying. I stroke her hair and kiss all over her face and tell her I love her and that she is my BFF and we will work everything out. I cradle her in my arms and rock her like a baby. Finally she stops crying and looks at me and says "I will do anything to stay your BFF even if it means not being a lesbian. I don't care about other women, I just want to be in your life." So i smile and I say "THAT is what I wanted to hear!" and I am so happy I hug her tight. I tell her I will research how to help people who dont want to be lezbo's anymore and we will break her immorality together.

So we lay there just holding each other. Eventually she falls asleep and around 10pm I wake her up because she has to be home by 10:30. I walk her to her car and hold her again and she drives home.

I need to help Bekah. i want her as my BFF forever. I need to break her immoral lesbian desires. I will begin tomorrow.

Thanks for reading!
Steff

Sunday, September 17, 2017

Punishment!

Its around 1am Saturday night and I can't sleep so I will write a blog entry.

So Bekah was over today. After the football game (which we won, YAY!) Bekah drove me home. dad went with his friends to some fishing show, I have no idea, so it was me and Bekah in my house. We went up to my room (I was still in my cheer outfit) and I was all happy because we won. I plopped down on my bed and asked Bekah if she liked my cheers and she said yes. So i asked her what she wanted to do and she said she couldn't stay late because she had a DATE TONIGHT.

What the actual fuck......

So I am all "Who the hell are you having a date with?" and she says "This girl I know from a few towns over, we met online and I haven't seen her in a while so I am going to go see her and we are going out." So I am all "Is she a lesbian too?!?!" and Bekah says "yes." I ask her if she is going to have lezbo sex with her and she says "I hope so."

What
the
fuck.....

So I am mad so I am all "Fine, whatever". I mean, whatever she is a lezbo and I am not but she is still MY BFF which means I COME FIRST....omfg...she needs to learn this. SO Bekah is all "Are you ok? are you mad?" and I am all "No, do whatever you want, go be lezbo if you must."

So Bekah sits next to me and says "Steff, you keep telling me you AREN'T a lesbian, but you are acting all mad and jealous that I have a date. What the hell is wrong?" so I turn over on my back and I say "You are my BFF, I should come first." So she says "You are also my BFF and you DO come first but I also need to date and be with other girls like me sometimes."

So I say "But I wanted to spend tonight with you!" and she says " I know but I also have a life too, and I have to live it, you need to understand." I wanted her to stay with me so i slowly start to open my legs and I am all "stay with me" and she says "Steff, stop it. That is not going to work this time. You always tease me and show me yourself but you wont give me yourself, that is why I am going out with someone tonight." So I say "I dont give you myself because I am NOT a lesbian!"

So Bekah lays down on her back next to me and stares up at the ceiling and says "I know you aren't, but I AM and I need to be with my own kind sometimes."

So I get a bright idea. I flip over and sit on her waist, straddling her. And I say "Ok but first I want to shower with you." and she is all "No Steff, no teasing." And I put my hands under her shirt to lift it up and she is FIGHTING ME and is all "Stop Steff". So I keep trying to lift her shirt up and she keeps stopping me and I am all "I want to see you" and she is all "Steff, no, its too much for me."

So I try to unbutton her shorts and unzip them and she tries stopping me and I am all "I want to see your pussy" and she is all "NO, cmon Steff" so I keep trying to unbutton and unzip her and she keeps trying to stop me. So I pin her arms down and I lean right up into her face and I say "I want to see your pussy before you let that lesbian eat it" and she says "Steff, no" So I say "I KNOW you will be thinking of me while she eats you, admit it." And she gets this look on her face and quietly says "Yes." So I say "So let me see your pussy then." And I try pulling her pants off and she keeps trying to stop me, but not as much as before.

SO I say to her "I know when she is eating your pussy and licking inside you, you will be imagining its me. But it never will be, all you'll ever be able to do is dream about it." And she softly says "I know." So again i say "Let me see your pussy" and this time she doesnt fight me. I unbuttoned her jeans shorts and unzipped them and pulled them off of her. I can see her panties are soaking wet, so I say "I know this is turning you on, you are all wet." and she softly says "Yes." so I run my fingers across her stomach and inside her panties and I can feel her wetness on my fingers and I pull her panties off. I lift her shirt up and undo her bra and now she is naked underneath me.

So i say to her "From now on whenever I want to see you naked do NOT fight me on it ok?" and she says "Yes" softly.  I look down and I can see her pussy is soaking wet. So I get off of her and take her hands and pull her up off the bed. I wrap my arms around her and she holds me tight and I whisper to her "Youll never have me and this is punishment for your sinful wicked lesbian desires. do you understand?" and she says "yes." and so I take her hands and lead her into the bathroom. I get undressed and we shower together.

Afterwards we dry off and she gets dressed and says she has to go for her date. I tell her to have a nice time and she drives off.

So now I am in bed wondering if that lesbian is eating her out. I guess I will find out tomorrow!

Thanks for reading!
Steff



Wednesday, September 13, 2017

night thoughts

I'm tired and in bed and cannot sleep so I will write some thoughts.

People think I have it easy because I am hella cute and positive and have a lot of money and a huge house. But it hasn't all been so easy. A lot of people do not like me because I speak my mind and give my opinion blunt and to the point. A lot of people in my school resent me because dad and I have money and a lot of people in my school do not so they are jealous. They also think I am some sort of traitor because dad hired a vocal coach so i would lose my Appalachia accent. They think I turned my back on where I came from. Well DUH no shit I turned my back on it because it SUCKED!!!! You think I liked living in a trailer in poverty!?! NO! That accent was a constant reminder where I came from and dad did NOT want me to be forever re-judged because of how I talked. he went through a lot of shit because if his own accent in the business world and he did NOT want me to suffer the same.


Bessie (my basset hound) is very lazy. All she does is sleep. But it is ok because she is awesome in her own way. She is also very snuggly and has huge floppy ears which are SO cute.


Bekah is my BFF. I am so happy she is in my life. I LOVE teasing her, it gets her so frustrated it is adorable. But I also love the feeling of power I get from doing it. I love teasing her with little glimpses of myself and comments. then, when we are alone, I can torture her even more. But is also true I love sleeping cuddled up with her. I feel warm and safe and protected and loved. Even though she wants me, she knows she cannot cross that line, and she never even tries. That is why I will sleep in her arms, because I trust her not to try anything. I think it is the purest form of friendship you can have.

I made her tell me all the sexual things she wanted to do to me, I told her to go into detail of everything. She took an hour to paint a picture of what she would do to me. the whole time she was telling me i booped her on the nose of teased her hair. it was adorable.

ok now i am sleepy so i am going to bed.
Thanks for reading!
Steff




Wednesday, August 30, 2017

Random stuff

So todays cheer squad practice was rough. We practiced a whole new set of cheers and they were very intense. My legs hurt now from doing so many kicks and splits.

Bekah came and watched cheer practice. It was nice having her there watching me. After practice was over I was too tired to go shower off so I just grabbed my stuff and told Bekah I was ready to go.

She could tell I was in a bad mood so we just walked quietly to her car. After I got in she asked me what was wrong. I told her I was just tired and sore from cheer squad, that was all. I said my legs hurt and I dont like being in pain so all i wanted to do was go home and take a long hot shower.
So she says "Without me?" with a laugh and THAT made me laugh and I said "I would rather take all my showers with you." And she got all quiet.

So she drove me to my house and I gave her a long tight hug before I got out. She put both her hands on the sides of my face and kissed me on the top of my head and smiled.

It is nice to have such a great BFF!


So I took a LONG hot shower (like an hour) and it was very relaxing. I finished my homework, played some WOWS, and now I am in bed just relaxing my poor hurting legs and feet.

So Friday Bekah and I are going to dinner and then to the movies. It will be fun! I have a new really really short miniskirt I want to wear and the cutest top to match!

Ok well I am going to bed!

Thanks for reading!
Steff

Tuesday, August 29, 2017

Tuesday 2day!

Almost time for bed! Another Tuesday in the books int he cute and positive life of Steffi!

We dissected a shark in biology today and I was a bit let down. I thought we would be dissecting like a 15 foot Great White or something but it was some lame 2 foot shark that didn't look at all threatening. Booo! False Advertising!

I will be staying late tomorrow after school for Cheer Squad. We have some new cheers we want to work on. Bekah said she would stay too and watch and drive me home so dad doesn't have to. That is SO sweet! I am very happy she will watch me cheer! Yay!

Bekah needs a new car though. She has an old Ford Escort and TBH it is kinda lame. She laughs at it and says it is all she can afford. She said it runs perfect because she maintains it and doesn't go abusing it like a lot of people here do to their cars. I told her I want a Corvette when I get my license and she said maybe I should get something older to learn how to drive before I get a $80,000 car. OMG I want a Corvette and that is what I am going to get!

We are going to go to the movies Friday night. It will be fun! Dad said I have to be home by 10 pm though, which is ok with me because I have to cheer Saturday.

I think that is all for now. I am going to go to sleep!

Thanks for reading!
Steff





Night!

I am in bed and I am very sleepy. I just got done chatting with Bekah on messenger. I miss her not being here.

I was thinking of what to buy her. i want to get her a gift but I am having trouble deciding what kind of gift. We were chatting tonight about her sexuality and she explained to me there are 3 types of lesbians (which I didn't realize!):

Butch
Femme
Tomboy

Butch lesbians look, dress, act, and talk like men. Bekah said they have short crew cut hair, don't wear makeup, wear pants never dresses or skirts, and are usually heavier or bulkier.

Femme is the total opposite. They look, act, dress, and are otherwise indistinguishable from straight women. They usually are VERY fit, wear more expensive clothes, and are very good looking.

Tomboy is a combination of the 2. Bekah said that is what she considers herself. A Tomboy will wear flannel and jeans and boots like a butch, but has long hair, wears makeup, and acts and talks like a Femme. She pics of the three types:










she said if I was a lesbian (which I am totally NOT btw) I would be a femme type.

So based on all this information I was thinking of something toboyish for her. I was going to buy her some nice panties BUT she wears guys boxers as underwear. I guess that is a tomboy lezbo thing.

So instead I decided to buy her a few Neff beanies and a flannel shirt. I think she will like them.

She also said you can tell whats up with lesbian couples based on their types. Like a Butch-Butch couple will usually last a lifetime as they are straight up 100% sure of their sexuality but their may be issues with both trying to be "alpha" or the man in the pairing.

A Femme-Butch couple is usually a disaster because in this situation the femme isn't really a lesbian but is bisexual or only THINKS she is a lesbian which is why she goes for a masculine looking woman.

Femme-Femme and Tomby-Femme couples are the most stable pairings apparently. Femme-Femmes work because they are both good looking and are more like best friends who happen to have sex. Tomboy-Femme works because the tomboy has just enough masculinity to be "the man" while still being 100% female and the femme is not threatened by this. It is all very confusing.

This is why I prefer to be with NO ONE. It is too complicated!

Ok I am off to bed!
Thanks for reading!
Steff

Friday, August 25, 2017

Friday Night stuff

So it is Friday night and Bekah is staying over (yay!)

The look on her face when she walked into my house was priceless. Her jaw was on the ground and she was all "omg you live here?" hahaha!

So I took her by the hand and gave her a tour of the house. She was all "what does your dad do?"
So i told her the story of me and dad and how we ended up here. She was all "My god this place is epic, i want to move in". that was so sweet :)

So dad made nachos and we ate and talked and stuff. Now dad is downstairs with his friends watching baseball and AS USUAL I am banished to the second floor because of my walking around in my underwear habit. Bekah was surprised by it. We went upstairs with the nachos and stuff to watch a movie and she was all "Why are you getting undressed?" and I told her this is how I walk around the house, it's just my thing. Then i was all "You shower with me and see me naked like almost every day what is the big deal?" and she was all "well, no big deal I guess."

Hahaha I made her blush. so I told her if she wanted she could walk around in her underwear too so she got undressed.

so now I am writing this as she plays COD. I bought that new CV on WOWS that everyone hates. I dont know why they hate it, I think it's pretty good. I guess because that stupid Little White Mouse chick hates it the lemmings who fall on her every word have to hate it as well.

So I played a few games with it and it has a steep learning curve but it IS effective if you just have patience and recognize what she can and cannot do Too many people just want an instant I WIN button (like Little White Mouse, who actually is a horrible player) instead of having to THINK and STRATEGIZE.

Tomorrow is game 2 of our football season and we will probably get clobbered again. I am sure Mandy will also screw up being the school mascot. But it won't matter, i will look hella cute in my cheer outfit and will try and spread positive vibes.

Ok I am going to go play more WOWS and then head to bed. Bekah is supposed to sleep in the guest room but I am going to ask her if she wants to sleep in my room. I have a king sized bed so there is room for two...plus Bessie, my basset hound.

Thanks for reading!
Steff




Wednesday, August 23, 2017

So I guess we are friends now

So I am lying in bed after doing homework and I am all tired from fencing. I just showered and pretty much was ready for bed when i get a friend request on FB. This is odd because I have only a few people on FB because its stupid. 90% of my friends are relatives.

So I look and its Bekah. Bekah is the lesbian girl from 12th grade. Bekah isn't her real name, I made it up to protect her identity cause no one needs to know her sexual orientation. I look at the request and I am all "What am i supposed to do about this?". So I decided to accept her request and she starts a chat with me thanking me for keeping her sexuality a secret and stuff.

So I start chatting with her and the next thing I know its 3 hours later and we had been chatting non-stop.

I don't know how that happened. We just started chatting and we apparently have a lot in common. Her family started out in poverty like I did. She plays video games and likes techno and trance. She said she first realized she was a lesbian when she first kissed a boy when she was 13 and felt nothing, but then kissed her friend on a dare and was all like hit by lightning.

I told her i didn't care about her sexuality and that if she was cool with me NOT being a lezbo then I wouldn't mind her being one. she said she wants to be friends and so I guess we are friends now. We exchanged phone numbers and added each other to Instagram and Snap Chat.

She told me she didn't agree with people who say I am an anti-social stuck up bitch. she said there is nothing wrong with wanting to be alone and having only a few close people. I was all "OMFG I know right!" It made me happy to hear someone actually AGREE with me about this.

I invited her over this weekend to meet dad. he has been wanting me to make friends so this should make him happy. Actually, I am going to ask if she can spend the weekend. It would be fun, we could make nachos and watch movies and swim in the pool and stuff.

It's actually nice to have a friend.

Thanks for reading!
Steff





Saturday, August 12, 2017

Chobittsu aka Chobit-389 threatens to rape me

Well I log in today and I see a message from a certain Mr Getty aka Chobittsu aka Chobit-389. Here is the unaltered message:

"No one wants to eat your pussy out except your dad. I would rather just rape your pussy and get your pregnant and piss on your face." -Chobit-389.

This is the sort of abuse Chobittsu throws at me, both here and on World of Warships. Despite all this, forum mod Niko Power, more than likely one of (((them))), refuses to do anything to sanction his friend Chobittsu. You know damn well if anyone looked at Little White Mouse the wrong way (who btw violates the NDA on her blog all the time) Niko Powerbergsteinovitz would ban the person for life.

But, I am cute and positive, so it does not get me down. I just save the messages and pass them to my dad who passes them to his lawyer. Trust me, eventually Chobittsu and his friends will lose their WOWS accounts due to their continued harrassment of me.

School starts Monday and I am very much looking forward to it! I have a wonderful cute outfit all picked out! Dad is NOT looking forward to driving me again hahahaha but I won't ride the bus because there is a lot of immoral and fat ugly people on it. I am looking forward to Cheer Squad again and all the fun it will bring.

See, perverts and immoral fat neckbeards like Chobittsu cannot bring me down. I am always cute and positive and I live my life that way!!! My cuteness and positive outlook will always win out in the end because ugly hateful people either give up or die in misery.

Thanks for reading!
Steffi




Saturday, July 15, 2017

Rank 11!

Yay! I am now Rank 11 on World of Warships! This is the highest rank I have ever achieved and I am very happy to have made it. My faithful Bayern has been kicking all sorts of ass and I am very comfortable with it. Going into rank, I thought my main ships would be my Duca or Budy, I wasn't planning on using a BB for ranked as I am a better cruiser captain. But my Bayern has been performing near flawlessly while my 2 cruisers got stomped, so I am sticking with my Teutonic  wrecking machine all through ranked this season.

Dad and I had a "discussion" today. He sat me down and said to me:

"I am just curious, but you never seem to want to hang out with your school friends or go on dates or anything. Is everything ok? I mean at school or in your life?"

I told him I was perfectly fine and that between fencing practice, the car wash, and yoga/tai chi I didn't have time to "hang out".

I then told him the truth about why I do not date (I knew he was going to eventually ask me). I told him flat out the thought of having any sort of physical or sexual contact with someone made me physically sick to my stomach and that I found the idea of it disgusting. He asked me if anything had happened to me that he didn't know about (I am pretty sure he was asking me if someone molested or touched me) and I told him NO, and that if it ever had happened I would have run screaming to him so he could kill them.

He said it was ok if I don't want to date but that healthy physical relationships with a loving partner in marriage is ok and that I shouldn't be disgusted by it. I told him i didn't care, that I found it gross and that at this stage in my life this is how I feel. Maybe someday if I met the right person it would change, but right now I am perfectly happy with who I am and what I do. So he smiled and hugged me and said I was his perfect angel and that he loved me. I told him I will always be his little girl and I loved him more than anything.

I am so glad I have such a healthy relationship with dad. We talk a lot and there is never any hidden things or topics out of bounds. It WAS hilarious though when I got my first period he had my Aunt come over to explain it all to me because he was too embarrassed to do it himself hahahahaha!

Anyway, off to bed!

Thanks for reading!
Steff





Wednesday, July 12, 2017

time for bed....

It's time for bed. Today it stormed all day so I wasn't able to do anything except work out and fencing practice. I played WOWS and managed to hold steady at rank 14.  So now I am in bed in my underwear just relaxing and hoping it does not rain tomorrow.

So I found this video interesting. As you may know, Istanbul was stolen from Christendom by the Turks. Her true name is Constantinople and the city is rightful Greek clay and rightfully belongs to the Christian world. This video explains things.


Now here are some cute kittens:


I am tired. Goodnight!

Thanks for reading!
Steff

Sunday, July 9, 2017

It is tiring

It is hard sometimes to be so upbeat and positive and cute when people just want to throw toxicity and ugliness at you. I am still being sexually harassed on World of Warships by Chobittsu and Flieger56. I am only 16 and yet I have to suffer crude and immoral attacks by grownups who want nothing more than to tear down my positive outlook on life and infect me with their hate and negativity.

Sometimes I think it isn't worth it and I should just stop playing the game that I love so much, but that would give those people a victory and they will sit in their basements with their hot pockets and mountain dew and goat to each other.

I do not understand how such a large company such as Wargaming tolerates underage girls being sexually harassed by adults on their forums, but they do. I wonder how they would feel as a target of a lawsuit? I wonder how many of those disgusting neckbeards would hiss and go crawling back into the darkness from whence they came?

It is sad that something so fun as WOWS is being ruined by a select group of sexual predators who seem like they are being protected by certain forum mods. I can only imagine the sick, twisted things that must go through their heads and I wonder how many other female players on the game they are harassing.

I am going to go to bed now. I hope tomorrow will be more cute and positive.

Thanks for reading!
Steff



Friday, July 7, 2017

Goodnight vibes

It is pretty late here and I am in bed in my panties and half shirt just all comfy and relaxed. dad already came in to say goodnight...he is probably snoring away. I know he snores because when I was young and would crawl into bed with him when it was thundering his snores were louder than the storm!

The dog is in her bed on her back with her paws in the air. I don't know why she sleeps like that but she is comfortable so whatever floats her furry boat.

I watched President Trump on TV tonight. It was good to see him with Putin. Russia is our friend, despite what people in the media think. She is Orthodox Christian (the same as me and dad) and she is the true heir to Rome. My dad hated Obama, when Obama said people like my dad didn't build their businesses he almost kicked the TV over he was so angry. His exact words were:

"I don't give a **** what that ****** Muslim piece of **** says, this is my ******* business built with my ******* blood and tears and he can go **** his ***** mother".

I didn't type out the profanity because I think it was excessive in this instance.

Orthodox Christianity is the true Christian religion, it is the purest form and its lineage goes all the way back to Byzantium. Someday, we will retake Constantinople. At least that is what my dad says, he claims it was stolen from us by the Turks and they have no right to it. I trust his word on this so I believe it too.

I was thinking about those ghetto thug guys today and how they leered at me. I am well aware I am very attractive and I am well aware of my own sexuality and how people perceive me. I am totally aware people look at me and think perverse thoughts and stuff, like that woman who wanted to scissor me. It used to bother me how people can look at me like a piece of meat, but honestly I am starting to just ignore it. They will never get to touch me so it is not important to my life. My own purity and morality is the most important thing to me, and I choose to stay this way.

Anyway, time for bed. Goodnight!

Thanks for reading!
Steff



Thursday, July 6, 2017

A cute day!

Today was a very cute and positive day for me and those I encountered. I worked 4 hours at the car wash and looked very cute in my shorts and lime green sleeveless half shirt. A woman said I was very pretty (I am glad she did not ask me to scissor!). I made people laugh with my jokes and it was a nice sunny day so everything was great!

So now I am home and in my room in my underwear and half-shirt just relaxing looking through the interwebz and listening to music. Dad has some friends over and they are watching baseball so I don't want to go downstairs since last time I did I embarrassed him because whenever I am home I only wear my underwear and a small half shirt. I am most comfortable in these two things and even though dad doesn't care I walked around the house like that (he is my dad so duh) he did say it is inappropriate for his friends to see it. I understand his point, guys being guys they will look and probably feel "something" seeing me like this even though I am 16 and they are all in their 40's. It is only natural an older man would desire a younger woman, it is simple biology. Younger girls are seen as potential breeding mates to a man, which is why you see so many older men with younger women.

Since I listen to my dad in all aspects I will stay up here till they are gone. It's ok, I have everything I need on the top floor of the house anyway so I don't have to go downstairs, I even have my own mini-fridge in my room full of green tea and cottage cheese and grapes, so I am good.

I will probably just relax some more and go to bed in an hour or so. The dog will eventually make her way up here, she sleeps in my room, she has her own comfy chair! And dad will eventually come in to say goodnight, he always does, even if I am asleep. sometimes he thinks I don't hear him but I always do. He kisses me on my head and says "goodnight my perfect gift from God". I pretend I am asleep if I am actually awake when he does this.

Anyway, that is it for today.

Thanks for reading!
Steff



Tuesday, June 27, 2017

What to do...

So its night here and it is still storming up a storm. I am in my underwear just laying on my bed writing this and listening to Digitally Imported. I don't feel like logging into WOWS and I am not in the mood to play Borderlands 2.

Dinner was great. Dad grilled some steaks and I managed to bake some potatoes without burning the house down. We saved the bones for the dog, she likes them a lot and it will keep her occupied for a few days.

Dad is writing some article for some financial magazine, I have no idea which one nor what it is about. He asked me a weird question tonight. He asked me "How come you never want to go out with your friends?"

I told him that I would rather spend time here at home with him and he said "You aren't always going to be able to spend all your time with me. Someday you have to start hanging out with people your own age."

I don't want to. Almost everyone I know is vulgar and immoral. The few people I am friendly with, well, they are great and all but I just don't want to do the things they like doing. I don't like the same music they do, I don't like the same movies they do, etc etc etc. I find it hard to relate to them on more than a few levels. I know what would happen if I started hanging out with people from school: I would get hit on constantly, the guys would call me a dick tease or something because I don't want any of them. There would be alcohol or drugs and sexual stuff, NONE of which I am interested in at all. So what is the point?

I don't understand why I can't just stay home with Dad, it makes ME happy, so why is it a bad thing?

Thanks for reading!
Steff